landmark grad Eisaku Kusaka
Eisaku Kusaka
(back row, third from left)
Japan

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Never Too Old for Adventure

I am called Kusaka-Papa by the people in the local Landmark office in Tokyo. I first participated in Landmark many years ago. After that, my wife participated and then my first son and now my second son. All four of us have participated in Landmark's programs. Also, my mother lives with us and has completed the Landmark program. After all the members of my family, including my mother and mother-in-law, completed the Landmark program, we all went to Saipan for our New Year vacation. I had heard that there would be a difference in the dynamic of my family after this course and on this trip I really saw how true that was and felt it for the first time.

My mother was 68 years old when she participated in the Landmark program. Before she participated, she was easily frightened and mostly stayed at home and would only go shopping to stores that were near our house. Since her participation, that's no longer the case. Her habit of talking used to be "I can't do this because I'm too old." Her way of living was doing the same thing over and over every day. It looked like the best way for her from my perspective as her son – that she didn't need any new things in her life.

She had never tried or even wanted to do new things at all. She would never have flown in an airplane in her whole life had she not participated in Landmark's program. However, such a mother did get on an airplane. My mother left Japan and she came to Saipan with us for vacation. She was great when she said “yes” to taking the trip. My wife and I acknowledged her for her courage and willingness to join us on the trip. We encouraged her to try out new things, to take new actions. If it wasn't for Landmark this wouldn't be happening.

One day after arriving to our vacation site in Saipan, my mother started saying things like she would like to take a “scooter-bob,” a kind of motorbike, to enjoy tropical fish under the sea with my wife's mother. She needed to put her head into the upside down glass bowl of the machine like a goldfish bowl but she needed to dive into the sea for a moment to do that. She tried many times but she couldn't make it easily and I thought she would be trapped underwater. Then at the moment of me almost saying "good try anyway, grandmother" she tried once more. Then just as I was about to say, “Grandmother, you did a nice try,” her head dove into the sea completely and her face was coming up into the upside-down glass goldfish-bowl-like machine. She was almost crying but she started to smile gradually; then she looked up and she really enjoyed watching the fish. She looked very satisfied for herself.

This trip to Saipan was not like previous trips my family had taken. Before, one member of the family was always making another one wrong. Somebody was complaining about the hotel or criticizing one of the sightseeing spots. Someone was always complaining about something at the end of the trip – there was always some dissatisfaction and emptiness. But this trip shifted to one with satisfaction for everybody involved. I was able to enjoy the trip so much when I saw each member of my family enjoying the trip. My joy became bigger and bigger.

As I am remembering my mother saying, "I can't do it because I am too old," I realize she no longer says this! I deeply love and respect my family for who they are and for contributing so much to my life – they are the source of my life. I have a great family and this is a result of Landmark.