The Power of Unity
Bottom Line's Daily Health News
Carole Jackson, April 29, 2004
As the presidential election gets closer and soldiers and innocents continue to die in the war on terror, I am struck by the widespread partisanship. If one can believe media reports, it seems in some ways that the Republicans and Democrats would rather spend their days blaming each other for the challenges of our society than working together to fix them. There also is the nonstop blaming of "others" who are at fault for the challenges of society -the war on terror, the Palestinians versus the Jews, the unemployment rates, racial discrimination, food manufacturers, car manufacturers, Martha Stewart, Janet Jackson, etc.
It seems to me that we all would be far better served if, instead of focusing on our differences, we realized that we are all part of [a global] community and, in fact, need each other for survival.
When too much negative energy is focused on differences rather than on how to make things work within our world community, it is not healthful for society - nor is it healthful for us.
NEGATIVITY AND HEALTH
When partisanship spreads out of the political arena and invades our personal lives, it can exact a heavy toll, confirms Joe DiMaggio, MD, senior program leader and Landmark Forum leader with Landmark Education. This international training and development company offers a unique educational program that creates breakthrough results for people and organizations. Even after we turn the TV off, frustration, irritability, and annoyance continue to play in our minds, taking away the positive energy that we all require for wellness. These negative emotions are bad for both our emotional and physical health. They cause anxiety and depression, raise blood pressure and lower immunity.
THE BATTLE OF RIGHT VS. WRONG
Bitter partisan divisions spill over into killing fields throughout the world and even in our own neighborhoods - Sunni Muslims vs. Shii'tes... Israelis vs. Palestinians... Serbs vs. Croats... Blacks vs. Whites... Neighborhood Gang vs. Neighborhood Gang. While in our day-to-day lives we generally don't kill real people, as happens in these conflicts, says Dr. DiMaggio, we do kill off the "liveness" of those whom we debate. We don't see them as fellow human beings - they become the people who are wrong. In the battle of right vs. wrong, what's often lost is vitality. It dissipates and wastes away in endless conversations of problems that are never resolved, poisoning relationships at home and at work. You might make your point, but at what cost? Is it worth it?
His advice? Don't mistake your view for the only view. Instead, consider the benefits of varying viewpoints. Without contrarian thoughts, many of the great discoveries of our world may never have happened because those visionaries simply would have done the same things in the same ways - safely, but without progress.
HOW DO YOU SEE THE COFFEE CUP?
In Landmark Forum seminars, there is an exercise that uses one simple prop - a coffee cup. Dr. DiMaggio stations one person on either side of it, and asks each what they see. One person might observe a round container that can hold liquid, while the other notices that the container is blue. They see it from opposing vantage points, so one may see a handle on the coffee cup, and the other one won't.
Whose description is correct? Who is right and who is wrong? What is the answer?
The answer is that there is no answer - at least no right or wrong answer. As Dr. DiMaggio puts it, "There are as many true views of the cup as there are people looking at it."
Seeing things from another person's point of view encourages less defensiveness and more openness, explains Dr. DiMaggio.
COMMUNICATION = COMMUNION AND SHARING
While it is tempting to get trapped in the world of right vs. wrong and we vs. they, especially when we are all surrounded by people who are similarly trapped, keep in mind that communication is more than just trying to prove your point. It means connection, not disconnection, says Dr. DiMaggio.
For the sake of your health and our society's health, consider stepping out of the traditional paradigm of taking sides...
Don't fall into the trap that "TV talk" is what normal discourse is like, advises Dr. DiMaggio. These unending ideological conversations are not true conversations.
Take it all with a grain of salt. Keep in mind that everyone is pursuing his own agenda and, hence, presenting information from his vantage point.
Give up being right about your point of view, says Dr. DiMaggio. This doesn't have to mean that you abandon your commitment to what you believe is right - but it does mean making a commitment to listen to what the other person is saying.
Step away and take a deep breath. Instead of becoming caught up in the politically and emotionally charged wrangling, focus on what really matters in life - your family, friends, health, work, hobbies, or religion and community.
Reprinted with the permission of: Bottom Line's Daily Health News Boardroom, Inc. 281 Tresser Blvd. Stamford, CT 06901 www.bottomlinesdailyhealthnews.com